Question 345: How long is the waiting period (iddah) for a widow, and what are her duties during this time?
Answer
✅Answer:
1 عَنْ عَلِيِّ بْنِ جَعْفَرٍ عَنْ أَخِيهِ قَالَ: سَأَلْتُهُ عَنِ الْمُتَوَفَّى عَنْهَا زَوْجُهَا كَمْ عِدَّتُهَا قَالَ أَرْبَعَةُ أَشْهُرٍ وَ عَشْراً
📚Qurb al-Isnad, p. 111
Translation: Ali ibn Ja'far said: I asked my brother Musa ibn Ja'far (peace be upon him): How long is the waiting period for a woman whose husband has passed away? He said: Four months and ten days.
✅In verse 234 of Surah al-Baqarah and numerous hadiths, one of which was mentioned, the waiting period for a woman whose husband has died is set at four months and ten days.
✅During the waiting period of mourning, a woman has duties, some of which are mentioned:
1 عَنْ زُرَارَةَ عَنْ أَبِي جَعْفَرٍ قَالَ: إِنْ مَاتَ عَنْهَا يَعْنِي وَ هُوَ غَائِبٌ فَقَامَتِ الْبَيِّنَةُ عَلَى مَوْتِهِ فَعِدَّتُهَا مِنْ يَوْمِ يَأْتِيهَا الْخَبَرُ أَرْبَعَةُ أَشْهُرٍ وَ عَشْراً لِأَنَّ عَلَيْهَا أَنْ تُحِدَّ عَلَيْهِ فِي الْمَوْتِ أَرْبَعَةَ أَشْهُرٍ وَ عَشْراً فَتُمْسِكَ عَنِ الْكُحْلِ وَ الطِّيبِ وَ الْأَصْبَاغِ
📚Al-Kafi, Vol. 6, p. 112
Translation: Imam Baqir (peace be upon him) said in a hadith: ..... because it is obligatory for the woman to observe mourning for her husband for four months and ten days (by refraining from adornment with specific rules) and therefore she must refrain from using kohl, perfume, and colors.
2 عَنْ زُرَارَةَ عَنْ أَبِي عَبْدِ اللَّهِ قَالَ: الْمُتَوَفَّى عَنْهَا زَوْجُهَا لَيْسَ لَهَا أَنْ تَطَيَّبَ وَ لَا تَزَيَّنَ حَتَّى تَنْقَضِيَ عِدَّتُهَا أَرْبَعَةَ أَشْهُرٍ وَ عَشَرَةَ أَيَّامٍ
📚Al-Kafi, Vol. 6, p. 117
Translation: Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him) said: A woman whose husband has passed away is not allowed to use perfume and does not adorn herself until her waiting period, which is four months and ten days, comes to an end.
3 عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ سُلَيْمَانَ قَالَ: سَأَلْتُ أَبَا عَبْدِ اللَّهِ عَنِ الْمُتَوَفَّى عَنْهَا زَوْجُهَا تَخْرُجُ إِلَى بَيْتِ أَبِيهَا وَ أُمِّهَا مِنْ بَيْتِهَا إِنْ شَاءَتْ فَتَعْتَدُّ فَقَالَ إِنْ شَاءَتْ أَنْ تَعْتَدَّ فِي بَيْتِ زَوْجِهَا اعْتَدَّتْ وَ إِنْ شَاءَتِ اعْتَدَّتْ فِي بَيْتِ أَهْلِهَا وَ لَا تَكْتَحِلُ وَ لَا تَلْبَسُ حُلِيّاً
📚Al-Kafi, Vol. 6, p. 116
Translation: Abdullah ibn Sulayman said: I asked Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him) about a woman whose husband has passed away, whether she can go from her house to her parents' house if she wants to and spend the waiting period there? He said: If she wishes, she can spend the waiting period in her husband's house, and if she wishes, she can spend the waiting period in the house of her family, and she should not use kohl and not wear jewelry.
4 الْحَلَبِيِّ عَنْ أَبِي عَبْدِ اللَّهِ قَالَ: سُئِلَ عَنِ الْمَرْأَةِ يَمُوتُ عَنْهَا زَوْجُهَا أَ يَصْلُحُ لَهَا أَنْ تَحُجَّ أَوْ تَعُودَ مَرِيضاً قَال نَعَمْ تَخْرُجُ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ وَ لَا تَكْتَحِلُ وَ لَا تَطَيَّبُ
📚Al-Kafi, Vol. 6, p. 116
Translation: Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him) was asked: Is it permissible for a woman whose husband has passed away to perform Hajj and visit a sick person (during the waiting period)? The Imam said: Yes, she can go out for the sake of Allah, but she must not use kohl or perfume.
5 أَبِي الْعَبَّاس قَال: قُلْتُ لِأَبِي عَبْدِ اللَّهِ الْمُتَوَفَّى عَنْهَا زَوْجُهَا قَالَ لَا تَكْتَحِلُ للْزِينَةٍ و لَا تَطَيَّبُ و لَا تَلْبَسُ ثَوْباً مَصْبُوغاً وَ لَا تَخْرُجُ نَهَاراً وَ لَا تَبِيتُ عَنْ بَيْتِهَا قُلْتُ أَ رَأَيْتَ إِنْ أَرَادَتْ أَنْ تَخْرُجَ إِلَى حَقٍّ كَيْفَ تَصْنَعُ قَالَ تَخْرُجُ بَعْدَ نِصْفِ اللَّيْلِ وَ تَرْجِعُ عِشَاءً
📚Al-Kafi, Vol. 6, p. 116
Translation: Abi al-Abbas said: I said to Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): What are the duties of a woman whose husband has passed away? He said: She should not use kohl for adornment, or use perfume, or wear colored clothes, and she should not leave the house during the day and not spend the night outside the house. I said: Inform me, if this woman wants to leave the house for a matter of necessity, what should she do? He said: She should leave after midnight and (at the latest) return at the time of Isha.
✅According to the above narrations, it is obligatory for a woman during the waiting period of mourning to observe 'hidad' and not adorn herself, and some examples of adornment are mentioned in the above narrations, such as using perfume, wearing colored clothes, using kohl, wearing jewelry, and so on.
✅Also, in Shia narrations (including 📚Al-Kafi, Vol. 6, p. 426), getting married during the waiting period of mourning is completely forbidden.
✅Regarding speaking with a stranger, there is no difference between the waiting period and other times, and the same general rules apply.
✅In the above narrations, colored clothing is forbidden for a woman during the waiting period of mourning, but the amount of covering in front of a stranger does not differ from other times.
✅In hadith 2 and others, due to the general prohibition of a woman adorning herself during the waiting period of mourning, she should also avoid other forms of adornment that are common today.